Problems are surrounding me nowadays. Dissatisfaction and jealousy cloud my house, not me. And this is the first time ever, i feel a real problem in the house. I feel that i'm carrying different types of baggage of problems/issues on my petite shoulders. Maybe it is time for me to know and understand that things don't really have happy journeys and endings and how my family really works. There are bound to be problems, big problems that at times, i just need a helping hand. A hand who would voluntarily reach out to me because i'm too confused and messy to even think who to look up for.

And marriage life isn't easy at all. There are alot of factors to consider apart from loving each other. I really mean freaking ALOT! So i realised the other factors have to be solved or at least have back up plans/solutions to overcome the challenge together. Chemistry is damn important too. Cause at the end of the everything, children will grow up and be gone with their partners but you? You will be left back with your partner again. So please, don't ever lose the chemistry or love amidst of taking care of the children till they are married. Your partner, no matter how much fights or arguments you have, will still be last one left standing just for you and only you.

Do i really have to witness(shahidah) everything right infront of my eyes? Please my dear Allah swt, let me remain ignorant in some stuffs.

Just when i thought that it is possible, everything just had to turn against me. So if for one moment i had really decided that i had enough with all this shit that's happening, please don't ask for me anymore. And i hope you would truly be happy for me and whoever i chose to spend the rest of my life with.

And for now, i really don't need other matters to bother me that much. Maybe it's time for me to learn to deal with anger and be patient cause i know being patient will pay off everything. I'll try my freaking best!

Berikan lah aku kekuatan untuk menghadapi segala cabaran ini.